In the Depths of My Feelings: 君が好きと思う
by MarshallLeEvil
Summary: Hijikata was so stressed with his delinquent of a student, she had been failing her grades except his subject, and he was puzzled by her. He found out who she really was and tried to change her. (Hijikata x OC)


**In The Depths of My Feelings: "I think I love you"**

* * *

The mirror reflected a man with elegant beauty, his lavender eyes and his silky gun-black hair, but the eye bags under his eyes clashes his beauty.

Hijikata Toshizou had been teaching in Hakuouki High for no more than five years, he never had a problem with his students since they were already scared of him, but one student broke that peace.

xXx

_Hijikata interviewed his delinquent of a student, who'd been cutting and skipping class and had poor grades. He sat on his chair as she stood there uninterested, "When can I talk to your parents?"_

_"I live alone."_

_"The address on your record is your old one right? Give me the new one."_

_"Elm Street," he had those words hung up in the air for a few seconds and took a deep sigh before he might say something bad._

_"What happened to your parents?"_

_"Dunno…" _

_"Have you ever talked to them ever since you lived alone?"_

_"No."_

_"Why?"_

_"They hate me I hate them."_

_"How do you manage for a living?"_

_"With my relatives who shut me up with money every month..."_

_"Is there a way for me to talk to them?"_

_"I don't think so."_

_Hijikata massaged his forehead, he felt like he's going nowhere with her, "Were you bullied?"_

_"Does it count if I asked for it?"_

_"No."_

_"Then no…"_

_The series of questions he asked became pointless with her answers. He wanted to hit her, he wanted to smash every inanimate object at sight, and he wanted to say 'fuck this' to her face but he couldn't. She has problems and needed his guidance as her teacher._

xXx

Hijikata was done checking test papers and his stress got worse as soon as he saw Souji's scribbles on the test, he ranked him as second on his problem-of-a-student. _No, that bastard isn't second he's the same as her. Why are they being such a pain in the ass!_

He kept the other undone papers on his desk and went to check up on his student whom he tasked to stay after school and write about her plans after she graduates. As he slid the door open he saw her looking into nothing. _Is she okay? Does she need a psychiatrist not me? _Hijikata tried to break the awkward silence in the room. Everyone has gone home except for them.

"Hey, you've been here for 2 hours and you haven't written anything on that paper," he crossed his arms as he sat on the desk in front of her, "If you want to go home, then at least have an ambition written there," he said in a form of a joke but she didn't laugh.

"After I graduate I want to live far away from people… a countryside maybe…" she said it in more of a whisper. Suddenly Hijikata remembered that not all her grades were a complete failure, her grades in math were higher than anyone else in his class.

"You're good at math, why don't you become an engineer maybe or a math teacher?"

"And follow your footsteps? No thank you." _Is she mocking me?!_

"THEN what do you want to do? Surely there's something there in your mind!" he looked into her black coal eyes that reminds him of the darkest night yet he saw nothing in her, she's someone who had already broke down, "Look, I can't be at peace if I sent each and every student of mine off to the _real _world knowing that they'd just be a loafer. You got that?"

"Right…" he felt a shrug from her.

"Let me help you."

"…"

"One more thing, why are you only good at math?"

"Because I'm only interested in listening to you..."

"Can you do the same with other- what?"

"Yes, I can if you say so."

Quite happy that he managed to change her a bit, he smiled and gave her a pat on the shoulder, "Work hard from now on." She didn't respond so an awkward silence swallowed the room for a few minutes.

"… I'll go home then," she said.

"Okay, be careful."

Hijikata took out a cigarette as she left; it relaxes him down a bit. He looked at the sunset. It was a beautiful sight then he saw her walking by the front gate, looking at her from afar made him think that she was very lonely. The way she walked lifelessly just can't make him stop thinking of what to do with her. He wondered what it would be like to have nothing at all, a broken family, but it was very painful just by imagining it, surely there's something he could do for her as a teacher.

xXx

The exams were over. Hijikata was checking the papers until one of the teachers approached him and praised the girl he asked to work harder. He felt happy because everything should be just the way it is. She should just be a good student and nothing will go wrong anymore.

After class he decided to talk to her again, "Why are you always making me stay after school? Aren't there any troublemakers you should tend to?"

"As of now you're the only one, I just want to congratulate you for being a top student. You did great," he gave her a pat on the head, he finally saw something in her eyes she wasn't empty anymore, but he still sensed loneliness in her.

"I see…" she walked away, "Thank you for being there for me sensei…" he felt like 'home' when she said that.

He sighed, "Wait, were you really that lonely?"

"Does that concern you?"

"I don't know…"

"A teacher should just only care for the well-being of his or her students in school, you've done quite enough sensei…" she gave him a warm smile.

"…" he stood silent for a while, "Which reminds me, you said back then that you're good at math because you're only interested in listening to me, what was that all about?"

"It meant exactly as it was said," her phone rang, she reached for it in her pocket, but she accidentally dropped it. But as soon as she reached for it on the ground Hijikata gave her a quick peck on the forehead, "W-Why…?" they were both kneeling, facing each other eye-to-eye.

"I think I love you…" his eyes were like the shade of a beautiful lilac flower, she froze at it. Her hands were trembling as he held onto it, then she finally snapped from her dream. She had a crush on him for quite a long time, she didn't expect him to change her and most of all fall for her. She giggled a bit.

"No, you _do _love me. But if I say 'yes' you might lose your job."

"Even I know that, but if that's the case I'll just wait for you."

"Well, there's nothing wrong with following your footsteps right?"

* * *

**You could say that I couldn't think of a name for the OC... To be honest this story had been in my imagination for quite some time so I thought I'd write it down immediately and share it to you guys.**

**Thank you for reading.**


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